Papi Chulo 5th Avenue: Air Male
Photo by bitzi at Flickr
Photo by bitzi at Flickr
July 6, 2009
Pierre: Hay ang kehtagal nawala sa ere ng Show Time natin ha!
Chester: Hello hello sa ating mga televiewers from around the barangay. Infernezz namiss ko yung mga advice column natin.
Pierre: Akswali isa lang inadvice-an natin... survivor na sya ngayon. Sayang at di natin sya guest ngayon para magtesti naman sa ating kabutihang ginawa sa kanya.
Chester: Gagah ka! Eh baka pagmumurahin lang tayo non.
Pierre: Ayy wag naman. I'm afraid really!
Chester: Tumigil ka na nga jan, sakit mo sa bangs.
Pierre: Well ano ba meron tayo today?
Chester: Meron tayong letter sender.
Pierre: Talaga meron pa non?
Chester: Oo naman. Check mo muna kung may Anthrax go!
Pierre: Lech! Ang cheap naman letter talaga ha! Meron naman e-mail o kaya text message. Hay naku sana nagtelegrama pa sya!
Chester: Actually nasaraduhan lang daw yata sya ng LBC. Cheh! Wag ka na magulo jan. Eto ang liham ng ating letter sender:
Hello, just wanna ask something, mind me? My bestfriend called me up around 2am and was crying, asking me these questions:
"Would you still continue a relationship with someone who cheats? Yet, would say he just did that out of boredom... someone who would reason out he was just flirting but still loves you. Sometimes, he would say I'm stupid, dumb and the like whenever he tries to point out something and I just cant get it, he can bear not to call or text whenever he feels like doing so, he can tell straight to my face that he doesn't wanna see me, just because he's mad. Someone who's too bossy, someone who's pride is bigger than his shadow, someone who doesn't usually say sorry, someone who would argue you with his bent ideas, someone who would initiate a break up when we fight (and that always keeps me askin' myself if he just did that out of anger or if the idea of breaking up was with him long before). Someone who hurts you yet you can't do something because of the fact that you love him so much and you can't leave him just like that after spending one year and two months with him.
I really wana give up but the idea of breaking up hurts like hell. How much more if its not an idea anymore? Would I survive? Yes I had lived all those years without him, but the fact that he came and became a part of me is a different story. Sometimes you really can feel he loves you and sometimes you can't. Help me please."
Chester: Telenovela ito ha! Infernezz inaantay ko talaga magsalita si Ateh Charo pero absent sya yata or nagnonose bleed pa. Oh help daw!
Pierre: Oo na! Hmm... remember everything during the relationship. If its worth giving a chance, then go. Help your friend. He's just going through some rough patch. That's going to be an easy yet difficult decision. Malabo pero you know what I mean.
Chester: Eh nag-uumenglish ka pa kasi eh.
Pierre: Kasi for me, once he cheats, its goodbye.
Chester: Ang masasabi ko lang, sometimes mahirap iwanan ang isang bagay na nakasanayan kahit nakakasama na ito sa atin.
Pierre: Well, casanova, let me put it this way: that sounds like a sure fire of a recipe for a disastrous relationship! I don't know about your friend, but when someone does at least one of the things described above to me well, I bolt out at once and get the hell out of that situation!
I may love deeply but I am not a martyr for one. Learn to love yourself first before you get to love someone. And keep that self respect first and foremost. Why lengthen the agony and give that two-timer guy the best of his life. No way!
Every man should learn how to survive and survive we will after every heartache we go through! Cry a little or cry a lot. But don't dwell on your agony too long. Life has so many things to offer. Live it! Savour it!
Chester: And another one! Pinapagnose bleed nyo akong dalawa mga leche kayo! Heniweyz, gusto ko bigyan ng award yang friend mo ha! Isang trophy para sa Shushunga Awards Night yah know. Anobeh! Kung nasasaktan ka na eh di gumora ka na. Ano pang use magstay sa relasyon kung walang pakiramdam yang partner mo? Baka mahawaan ka lang ng pagkamanhid. Hindi mo na alam na natapilok, nasaksak, o nabundol ka na ng trak. Time to wake up! Huuuyyy gising na! Go! Move on!
Pierre: Tumbling ako sa yo, friend! Nasinghot ko tuloy ang nosebleed ko. Pero tama ka! MOVE ON!
Chester: Pero minsan merong mga bagay na nakakasakit sa atin na gusto mo pa rin manatili yah know. Ito yung mga bagay na nagpapaalala sayo, "ayyy marunong pala ako makaramdam. marunong pa pala ako magmahal. kahit masakit titiisin ko." Una unahan lang yan ng tiisan factor. Kung matitiis mo syang antayin eh di go. Kung tiniis mo na't lahat at wa pa rin sya care bear sayo eh di go umalis ka na jan dali! At baka masampal kita ng bongga.
Pierre: Nakakaloka ang mga binitiwang salita! Meganoooooon?! Bakit nga naman hahayaang magpakasaya nitong cheater BF na ito habang nagdurusa ka naman? Think about it!
Chester: At bakit kasi nakikipagsabayan ka pa sa pag-uum-emote ni casanova? Feelingera ka rin eh!
Pierre: Baka gusto mo magfly-laloo ka na dito via Air mail kanina ka pa ha bwiset ka!
Chester: Ang ganda mo ngayon friend! Anong ginawa mo sa skin mo, its glowing!
Pierre: I know right!